bloody hell

Hey guys.

Wondering why the harsh blog title, eh?

Well, you won't be if you were taking your bloody 'O'-levels this year.

Damned freaking stressful, it is.

First month back to school, and the Sec 4s are already being spammed with a whole bloody pile of Mastery tests.

Nowadays its just test after bloody test.

No doubt as to why I'd be so damn pissed.

I've currently done completed 3 of my mastery tests. Only about.......I dunno.......5 more to go.

I should probably by studying for the remaining mastery tests right now. But goodness knows why I'm still using the com, especially at this sort of time at night when I've got bloody tuition early tomorrow morning.

Probably for stuff like this:

Sorry if I'm seem a little harsh on the choice of words, but trust me, I could do worse.

A hell lot worse.

The only 2 things which i can at least look forward to is the level camp next week, and being excused from CCA next Tuesday.

But the rest of the month is gonna be pretty much just three things:
1). Mug
2). Mug again
3). Mug some more

Thats basically gonna be how I spend the rest of the year, actually.

Like I said before, and I'd like to say it again right now just to reiterate:

Life's a f*cking bi*ch.

And thats all there is to it.

I really hate sec 4 life. Barely two weeks into the start of school and I'm already feeling as though its mid-june.

Damn, I'd like to see what mental and pysical state I'd be in when the time really comes.

Or, on second thought, maybe not.........

Praying to Korean goddess(es) can only do so much.

And I'm still trying to regain my sanity.

Till I'm sober,
Aloy

This is for Faris

Yo, Faris. Happy Birthday Bro. You 16 now, so you lucky ass can go watch a few movies I can't yet. But you just wait my friend. YOU JUST WAIT.


This is from your nigga. Happy Birthday!!! Blast off man. (metaphorically)

Beverley Hills.

Once again, the post title has nothing to do with the content. It was just written on my jeans.

So, what's up y'all? You'd probably be saying ''Nothin' '' if you were here so stuff it and keep the answer to yourselves.

I'm gonna be taking my 'O' levels this May, and I'd pretty much safely say I haven't started as much as my personal revision. So, I made it a point not to make that my resolution, seeing if I made it that, I'd never study for the whole of the year, and fail, and stay here, and become a worthless retard stitching shoes for idiots on the roadside. I'm just sayin'. So y'all better gimme all the luck you can or Imma file a lawsuit against you all saying I'm a roadside cobbler cos' you never wished me any luck.

I KEED!!

So, anyway, being in the second half of Sec 4, while having classes during holidays, there isn't really much time to wank around. Even if I get like a full solid 24 hour day to study I end up procrastinating away, and 2 days before the exam I end up pulling all nighters and looking like this.



So, I spent like a year and a half in this hellhole, without soccer, without women, without CCA (you'll think I'm crazy but when you're here, you'd take the CCA too), without running, without anything. So, y'all better watch out when I come back in mid-september.

No Faris. Don't say wake me up when september ends, now. I'mma give you the combat triangle if you do that. Well, seeing that that is just a way of sayin' I'm probably not gonna do that, but you get the point don't you malay?

Oh, and Aloy. Let Alistair do his own speech for class chairman. Yes, it does seem rather attractive to be class chairman in the Sec 1 stage and that you'll get benefits for Student Leadership later on, it is a very dog job. You need to go to the General Office for each and every darn thing, and you need to come to school earlier than all the rest to open up the damn class. You'll be held responsible if your class does something wrong.

My advice.

Run for Vice-Chairman. You'll still get the benefits, and it is still a dog-job, but not as dog-gish as the Chairman's and you won't be as responsible as him. Or, there are the other positions of class committee like Secretary, Environmental Champion, Treasurer and stuff like that. And you Aloy, were the Secretary once, so maybe you could tell your brother what it is like. But if he wishes to be top dog, it really is up to him.

And Faris, while you and I spend our time making Niagara Falls of drool from our mouths while looking at this chick




we tend to forget this.



But, since we are all fearless bastards, and know that he can't lay a finger on us if his wife wants to show us herself, we are perfectly alright.

Cheerios, from your favourite Nigga

Stress

Alright, alright. I admit its a little too soon for what the blog title says, seeing as its only my first week back to school.

But damn, I'm already feeling the stress.

I've got three mastery tests to study for in the coming week, as well as a Biology paper, A math worksheets and a speech to prepare for my bro (apparently he's running for class chairman).

I know that doesn't seem like a whole lot to VJ, but thats already biting off more than I can chew, for me, at least.

Bloody hell, first week back, and I'm already lagging behind. I seriously gotta get my game back on before I screw things up. Add CCA Open House and 'O'-level revision into the equation, and you'll end up with a really big mess.

My bro's also in Commonwealth this year. So Imma be taking the morning bus to school with him and such.

Hope he gets Vilau as his P.E teacher. My brother is seriously outta shape.

Well, not really. If you can count 'round' as a shape. ZB says he looks like a snowman, and even I gotta agree to that.

But what the hell. I'm only gonna be here for another year. After I graduate, he ain't gonna be seeing me around in school anymore (goodness knows whether thats a good thing or not).

But enough said about him. Time for more pressing issues.

I dunno why.......I figure its either the stress, or the impending approach of the 'O's that causing it; I'm losing my interest in SNSD.

For some reason (goodness knows what), I ain't that crazy over them as I was a year back. The rush is gone, you know what I mean?

When I see them, I don't feel the rush of blood to my head. I don't swoon uncontrollably. Wild fantasies and frequent daydreams have become a thing of the past. No longer are the days which I would spend hours on end watching their music videos and reality TV shows.

I fear I've lost the customary sensations of inexplicable elation and unadulterated delectation whenever I see them goofing off on reality TV shows, or simply slurping away happily on instant noodles during commercials, all for the sake of beating others in a race for the paper chase.

I'm sorry if I seem like some @$$hole going through his midlife crisis. I know this ain't a big F*** to most of you readers, but to me, I feel like I've lost a piece of myself.

Its like a favorite pasttime has just been ousted out of my life by the inevitability of facing the 'O's.

In short, I'm irrevocably, irrefutably and undeniably screwed.

All in a couple of weeks.

Wow. Thats gotta be a record.

Haiz........

Forgive me, my Korean godesses.

Forgive me, Yoona.



Forgive me, Sunny.

Forgive me, Hyoyeon

Forgive me, Sooyoung.



Forgive me, Yuri.

Forgive me, Seohyun.

Forgive me, Jessica.

Forgive me, Tiffany.

And finally.........

Forgive me, Tae.

But 'O'-levels place a bigger priority in my life. At least till I graduate.

So until then, I gotta be sacrificing most of my time for studies.

Haiz......

Gotta go. Imma be doing research for myEnglish project now.

Time is running short.

Till I regain my sanity,
Aloy



Going Back

Similar to Vijay, this title came out of nowhere. BUT ITS RELATED SO HELL YEAH
So, school is up and running again and when I went on Tuesday for the first day of school, all the faces of the people were like this:

Yep I was one of 'em.

But guess what, I though the day would get better. Maybe, by the end of this week, I'll be okay.
WHAT THE F#CK WAS I THINKING?!?!?

First day, i got caught for a fringe that's ONLY A FEW MILIMETRES LONG.
No, I didn't do an emergency haircut in the men's room.
I went home to get a haircut. Thanks to my mum though. Didn't have to pay.
But while waiting for Kishore and Varshan to clear up their mop of hair(and goatee - varshan), I managed to eat, watch tv, slack, and lie down. THEN I went back to school. Not quite the first day I had in mind.

Day two wasn't so bad. I would be getting a new Math teacher, and I was waiting to see who it was.
It was my past year's A-Math teacher, now teaching us both Maths. WTF?!?!
I was pissed. I cannot tolerate her. I made up my mind to drop to another band.

Shortly speaking, I hate this week. Hope it will get better. Lady Luck may be a bit overdue in sending me luck. Bah. wishful thinking. 

And by the way, I can't play soccer like I used to anymore. I just don't have it in me. So now when playing soccer I'm not considered a threat anymore. I'm useless :(

But for all I know, looking at her can make my day better:

My day just got instantly better. Take that, Alessandra.
The runway ain't big enough for the both of them, minus the wings.

Till I get a better week,
Faris

Superman.

Don't ask me the reason for the post title. It was just there on my shorts.

And, whoa. This is what I'm talking about guys. Back to back posts by all members of The Community. Well there are only 3 members, but you get the point don't you. You better get the point.

Okay, so first things first. Faris, seeing that the Mayans probably never had school or Maths teachers, its actually quite a remarkable feat they could actually count up till 52. So, lets give them ol' hairy guys a bit of credit.

*Claps*

So, I admit did go through a bit of trouble to hold back the skin pun, but I did manage to after waging war with my brain and heart. The heart won. It always wins. Like they say, you always follow your heart.

And, I did give the girl a try. BUT, she said no for reasons of her own which I prefer to keep private for her convenience. However, she is one of my really good friends here. And mind you, those are in short supply these days. I don't expect a fairytale romance bro'. Nope. Close, but not there yet. And, I ain't a playboy like you. 2 girls at 10. F*ck you man. Minor pimp. Just kidding la bro'.

Your resolution was not to make a resolution. People never follow resolutions. So you are not going to follow your resolution of not making a resolution by actually making one. So, you did not fulfill your resolution of not making a resolution by actually making a resolution.

Ey, this is fun man.

And so Aloy, in case you find it hard to study, just plaster formulas all over your poster of Taeyeon. Probably that will serve as a win-win situation, seeing that you can look at Taeyeon and have imaginary s*x with her as well as cram formulas into your head.

I'm just saying.

Well, X-Rated is more like full frontal nudity and that sort of stuff. So, maybe we could call that PG-13. Yeah. And Singapore may not crack into an exact half because it is an irregular polygon with multiple vertices, therefore rendering the chances of it cracking into an exact half as possible as me growing a tree out of my underpants.

I'm just sayin'.

And Obama might just do a Jackson sometime and end up swiggin' a bottle of painkiller and become like a high squirrel? Just sayin' again.

And I just realised something. Ever since I came to India, I don't swear as much as the days in Singapore. Maybe becuase noone here knows the meaning of the swear words so there is really as much point as shooting bullets into tar about that. But I wanna swear so bad, when I come back. You better be ready.

*In Arnold Schwarzanegger voice* I'll be back.

Oh, and talking about the Governator, he's doing the Expendables 2 with Sly Stallone.
Talking about old Sly, he is 65 now, and has never taken steroids in his whole life. And he just did a movie. Guess what he looks like in it?



He still got it man. 65. W.O.W

'Course the tattoos are fake, but look at him man. Damn I sound like a 6 year old.


Anyways y'all. Don't go under the delusion I'm gay for ending the post with a guy because, I'm not. If you don't believe me, I'll give you this.



Alessandra Ambrosio.

Yes Faris, rival and friend of your woman.

I ain't gay.
VJ

*Ey, that rhymes...

a new year

wow, there has been a flurry of activities here recently, huh? and to think that i havent posted about new year...
I might be a day late, but Happy New Year to all. 2012 is here and we all know that the end of the world isn't near. The Mayans simply ran out of space in their calendar that is effective in remembering events 52 years ago. (Fact: I can count higher than 52. Beat that, noob Mayans)
It just so happens that this calendar thingy, or the long count, started at a specific year and will end on 2012.(Fact: I can count higher than 2012. dumb Mayans)

Okay, enough about the history lesson and my counting skills(which are good).
I would like to take the time to reflect on 2011. yes, it has been eventful. And the fact that i had many new experiences, both good/bad, really made Sec 3 a bitter-sweet affair. but now its 2012, and the O levels are coming. I know The Community will be in short supply of posts because of this but hey, sacrifices may need to be made. I also do not want to go all loco with the exams till i start insulting myself (kudos to Vijay for holding back on the skin pun).

Speaking about Vijay, my homie, since we are all still young, why not give the girl a try? In a good way, i mean. Not have a 'kenduri' with your friends.(Kenduri is malay street talk for passing around the girl like AIDS) Since you have admired her, why not go to the next level. Intearct. Talk.

Trust me, you're hearing from a guy who got into a relationship at the age of 10. I've been in three failed relationships. Bummer. But then again, I was dating both girls at the same time. Okay, forget it. What I'm trying to say is that don't expect a fairytale romance. If you're just okay with you being in her presence, then with all due respect bro, its up to you if you want it to stay that way.

My other homie, Aloy. Hope you've studied hard. I studied hard too. I want you to not pressurize yourself  for the exams. And let's hope you will fulfill your resolutions and not keep them under your bed with the, umm....other things you keep there(wink-wink). stay cool, aight? dont go all loco on the tests because if you do, no matter how blown out of proportion this is, I will ask Taeyeon to personally hit you where the sun don't shine. I'm just saying, it may happen. Or I can do it myself. No pressure.

Hmm....my resolutions. My resolution is to not make a resolution because if i dont fulfill it there will be bombardments of comments from critics and i will be labelled as a overachiever who has no goals but to sit down and watch Victoria's secret all day in 3D just because his friends are busy doing something better like doing porn getting themselves captured while escaping to Russia and they shall be castrated!

What colourful imagination I have....

Anyways, for now, my resolution goal is to pass at least one math test. I blew my chance last year. Its time to try.

Oh well, thats all for now. I do admit my so called X rated post is not up to par. If Vijay did it, I would be blind, Singapore cracks into half and Obama would be white.

I'm just saying.

And now I end off with a sexy creative shot of Miranda Kerr (hey if aloy can put Taeyeon on every post, i guess there's nothing wrong with this)

Yes folks, nothing wrong at all.

Till we meet again,
Faris


Happy New Year To All